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To my surprise, my marijuana use has been tapering off steadily.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Tapering
Steadily
Marijuana
Surprise
Use
More quotes by George Carlin
Soft rock music isn’t rock, and it ain’t music. It’s just soft.
George Carlin
If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea…does that mean that 1 enjoys it?
George Carlin
Test of Metal: Will of Iron, Nerves of Steel, Heart of Gold, Balls of Brass.
George Carlin
Property is theft. Nobody owns anything. When you die, it all stays here.
George Carlin
I do something about the weather. I stay home.
George Carlin
Most of the time people feel okay. Probably it's because at the moment they're not actually dying.
George Carlin
No one is ever more him/herself than when they really laugh. Their defenses are down. It's very Zen-like, that moment. They are completely open.
George Carlin
Golf is an arrogant, elitist game that takes up entirely too much space in this country.
George Carlin
Political discourse has been reduced to Where's the beef? Read my lips, and Make my day. Where are the assassins when we really need them?
George Carlin
And speaking of sex, the Immaculate Conception does not mean Jesus was conceived in the absence of sex. It means Mary was conceived without Original Sin. That's all it has ever meant. And according to the tabloids, Mary is apparently the only one who can make such a claim. The Jesus thing is called virgin birth.
George Carlin
Before they give you a lethal injection, they swab your arm with alcohol. It's true. Well, they don't want you to get an infection, and you can see their point. They don't want some guy go to hell and be sick.
George Carlin
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loath and despise the groups they identify or belong to.
George Carlin
Once the high priests and the traders took over, we were lost as a species.
George Carlin
Whenever you see the word cuisine used instead of the word food, be prepared to pay an additional eighty percent.
George Carlin
The phrase surgical strike might be more acceptable if it were common practice to perform surgery with high explosives.
George Carlin
Writing is really wonderful art. A lot of this is discovery. A lot of things are lying around waiting to be discovered and that's our job as writers is to just notice them and bring them to life.
George Carlin
Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.
George Carlin
In baseball the object is to go home! And to be safe! - I hope I'll be safe at home!
George Carlin
Religion is just mind control.
George Carlin
How is it possible to have a civil war?
George Carlin
