Quote

I was a stonehead for 30 years. I'd wake up in the morning and if I couldn't decide whether I wanted a joint or not, I'd smoke a joint to figure it out. And I stayed high all day long.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Figures
Couldn
Joint
Morning
Joints
High
Stayed
Whether
Smoke
Wanted
Wake
Long
Decide
Years
Figure

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I think self-expression is present at all times, and whether or not you're talking about the outside world or your responses to it depends on the moment and the subject.
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I never joined the Boy Scouts. I don't trust any organization that has a handbook.
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Sex always has consequences. When Hitler's mother spread her legs that night, she effectively canceled out the spreading of fifteen to twenty million other pairs of legs.
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Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That's just common sense!
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Your dog thinks you're a god. Your cat thinks the dog's an asshole.
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I was once dancing with a woman who told me she had a yeast infection so I told her to bake me some bread.
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It's a keep your fingers crossed business, the entertainment business.
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Picture your grandmother in Hell, baking pies... without an oven.
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