Quote

For a long time, I've distinguished between entertainer and performer and entertainer and artist. To me, an entertainer is someone who pleases others, and an artist tries to please himself.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Long
Distinguished
Time
Performers
Tries
Please
Artist
Entertainer
Others
Pleases
Someone
Entertainers
Trying
Performer

More quotes by George Carlin

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But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?
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Religion cruelly exploits our need to feel connected.
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If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you're gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders.
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The surgeon general warned today that saliva causes stomach cancer. But apparently only when swallowed in small amounts over a long period of time.
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No matter how you care to define it, I do not identify with the local group. Planet, species, race, nation, state, religion, party, union, club, association, neighborhood improvement committee I have no interest in any of it. I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to.
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When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' 'He's two' will do just fine. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place.
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In Rome, the emperor sat in a special part of the Colosseum called the Caesarian Section.
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So, have a little fun. Soon enough you'll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family.
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What year did Jesus think it was?
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You show me a tropical fruit and I'll show you a cocksucker from Guatemala.
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I just try to find targets I feel something about and express it my way.
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Interesting form of murder we come up with: Assassination. We assassinate people who've told us to live together in harmony and try to love one another. Apparently we are not ready to live together.
George Carlin
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So far, this is the oldest I've been.
George Carlin
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No one who has had Taps played for them has ever been able to hear it.
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Baby boomers helped me a great deal in my career. They launched me. They were there for me to sing my song to. And I'm not saying I'm better than anyone, but I think they turned that anti-authority baby boom mentality into their own enemy. Now I identify very closely with their children.
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You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.
George Carlin
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Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard
George Carlin
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There's a thrill when you steal something in plain view of other people. When you drop a newspaper over a sign and walk away with it, or take something off a wall and the sound of the glue ripping makes people turn around. Your heart is racing, it's a rush.
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I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.
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I think we overrate ourselves in terms of our abilities and capacities. I mean, just because you can build a really swell bridge doesn't, to my way of thinking, mean that you're an advanced civilization.
George Carlin