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Once the high priests and the traders took over, we were lost as a species.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Traders
Priests
Species
Took
High
Lost

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We [americans] are not a freedom-loving people in the beautiful, spiritual sense. We have an inspiring Constitution, but we're a hardhearted people.
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Life is a zero sum game.
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Hallucinogens are a value changer...like it or not, it changes your values, it opens up windows (doors of perception.)
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Religion is just mind control.
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I always knew I could hold people's attention and make them laugh every 30 or 40 seconds, and I got approval and attention for that, so the behavior was reinforced. Later, that became an important skill on the street corner.
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You're really spread out now, you've got stuff all over the WORLD! You've got stuff at home, stuff in storage, stuff in Honolulu, stuff in Maui, stuff in your pockets...supply lines are getting longer and harder to maintain.
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I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loath and despise the groups they identify or belong to.
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I was once dancing with a woman who told me she had a yeast infection so I told her to bake me some bread.
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Don Ho can sign autographs 3.4 times faster than Efrem Zimbalist Jr.
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To my surprise, my marijuana use has been tapering off steadily.
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People who ask Can I ask you a question? Didn't really give me a choice, did ya there buddy?
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For an entertainer, part of the thing you do is just style. And the coke did help me get into great runs of pure form.
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People love to admit they have bad handwriting or that they can't do math. And they will readily admit to being awkward: 'I'm such a klutz!' But they will never admit to having a poor sense of humor or being a bad driver.
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The US Army has announced that although it is true they performed mind-destroying drug tests on hundreds of soldiers in the 1960s, none of the victims have been promoted beyond the rank of lieutenant colonel.
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There's an idea that the human body is somehow evil and bad and there are parts of it that are especially evil and bad, and we should be ashamed. Fear, guilt and shame are built into the attitude toward sex and the body. It's reflected in these prohibitions and these taboos that we have.
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When you're born in this world you're given a ticket to the Freak Show. And when you're born in America, you're given a front row seat. And some of us get to sit there with notebooks.
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The Human Species could have been great but instead we became satisfied with lights on our tennis shoes.
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You show me a tropical fruit and I'll show you a cocksucker from Guatemala.
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We now buy watches primarily for their looks, price, or additional functions. The fact that they tell time seems lost.
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Catholics are against abortions. Catholics are against homosexuals. But, I can't think of anyone who has less abortions than homosexuals!
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