Quote

Don't confuse my point of view with cynicism. The real cynics are the ones who tell you that everything's gonna be all right.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Right
Cynicism
Real
Gonna
View
Ones
Views
Point
Tell
Cynics
Everything
Confuse

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I don't understand why prostitution is illegal, Selling is legal, f***ing is legal. So why isn't it legal to sell f***ing? Why should it be illegal to sell something that's legal to give away?
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If God had intended us not to masturbate, He would have made our arms shorter.
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I think tobacco and alcohol warnings are too general. They should be more to the point: 'People who smoke will eventually cough up small pieces of lung.'... And 'Warning!! Alcohol will turn you into the same jerk your father was.'
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Surround yourself with what you love.
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Praying is begging for an unseen deity to alter the laws of nature for someone admittedly unworthy.
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When I listen to those tapes now, the real cocaine shows there's just nothing special about their content.
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Broadway isn't a very big career move. There's no money in it and it doesn't mean anything to your career. It's just a nice little jewel in the crown.
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How can He be perfect? Everything He ever makes...dies.
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Why do they bother with a suicide watch when someone is on death row? Keep an eye on this guy. We're gonna kill him, and we don't want him to hurt himself.
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You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.
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Just think, right now as you read this, some guy somewhere is gettin' ready to hang himself.
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I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.
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If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?
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If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else.
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When it comes to bullshit...bigtime, major league bullshit...you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims...religion.
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Know my feelings about traffic laws? Cop didn't see it? I didn't do it.
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When you quit school at an early age, I think you have a lifelong need to show the world - and maybe yourself - that you're really smart after all.
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May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
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I just love it when I hear a little commotion, someone leaving. When I see those doors in the back . . .
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I'm in favor of personal growth as long as it doesn't include malignant tumors.
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