Quote

Whenever you see the word cuisine used instead of the word food, be prepared to pay an additional eighty percent.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Percent
Instead
Food
Cuisine
Word
Additional
Used
Eighty
Whenever
Prepared
Pay

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I don't have hobbies hobbies cost money. Interests are quite free.
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I sort of gave up on this whole human adventure a long time ago, divorced myself from it emotionally. It gives me an artistic detachment that I find valuable. I think the human race has squandered its gift, and I think this country has squandered its promise, for the sake of cell phones and Jet Skis.
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Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?
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Instead of thinking about the sex, I'd always think about the clap and the crabs those people have.
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When he got loaded, the human cannonball knew there were not many men of his caliber.
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And, of course, the funniest food: kumquats. I don't even bring them home anymore. I sit there laughing and they go to waste.
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Nothing you see on the Internet is mine unless it comes from one of my albums, books, HBO specials, or appeared on my website.
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Hitler never bothered with restaurant reservations he just dropped by. And somehow they always found him a table.
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Do you think Sammy Davis ate Junior Mints?
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Catholics are against abortions. Catholics are against homosexuals. But, I can't think of anyone who has less abortions than homosexuals!
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You're all going to die. I hate to remind you, but it is on your schedule. It probably won't happen when you'd like generally, it's an inconvenience.
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As powerful as anyone may claim God to be, somehow he always needs money.
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By elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
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If you ask me, we could do with a little less motivation. - The people who are causing all the trouble seem highly motivated to me. - Serial killers, stock swindlers, drug dealers, Christian Republicans.
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Religion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind.
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The status quo sucks.
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The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
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Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
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The dividend I get [from my compulsion] is the freedom to be totally disorderly in my dreamworld.
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