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And now gay people want to get married... Haven't they suffered enough?

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Suffered
Gay
Havens
Haven
Married
Enough
People

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Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
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A pear is a failed apple.
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Traditional American values: Genocide, aggression, conformity, emotional repression, hypocrisy, and the worship of comfort and consumer goods.
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You wouldn't know it, from some of the things I've said over the years, but I like people. I do. I like people, but I like them in short bursts. I don't like people for extended periods of time. I'm all right with them for a little while, but once you get up past around... a minute, minute and a half, I gotta get the fuck out of there.
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In the doggie dictionary, under bow wow it says, See arf arf.
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Religion cruelly exploits our need to feel connected.
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Catholics are against abortions. Catholics are against homosexuals. But, I can't think of anyone who has less abortions than homosexuals!
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The secretiveness. The stealth. Those were obviously the aspects of cocaine use I was addicted to.
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It's harder to be funny from the position of power.
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Fussy eater is a euphemism for big pain in the ass.
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Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard
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For an entertainer, part of the thing you do is just style. And the coke did help me get into great runs of pure form.
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I always wanted and enjoyed sex, but I never put much importance on scoring or having an athletic sex life. I guess I define myself more by my career and my commitment to a relationship than by my ability to have a lot of chicks or achieve ten orgasms in an evening.
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Test of Metal: Will of Iron, Nerves of Steel, Heart of Gold, Balls of Brass.
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When you're born in this world you're given a ticket to the Freak Show. And when you're born in America, you're given a front row seat. And some of us get to sit there with notebooks.
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I always knew I could hold people's attention and make them laugh every 30 or 40 seconds, and I got approval and attention for that, so the behavior was reinforced. Later, that became an important skill on the street corner.
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Do you think Sammy Davis ate Junior Mints?
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The sicker you get, the harder it is to remember if you took your medicine.
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