Quote

Regarding local residents attempting to ban sex shops from their neighborhoods: You show me a parent who says he's worried about his child's innocence and I'll show you a homeowner trying to maintain equity.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Sex
Attempting
Says
Shops
Homeowner
Parent
Locals
Homeowners
Child
Neighborhood
Neighborhoods
Show
Local
Residents
Shows
Maintain
Bans
Children
Innocence
Regarding
Trying
Worried
Equity

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For a long time, I've distinguished between entertainer and performer and entertainer and artist. To me, an entertainer is someone who pleases others, and an artist tries to please himself.
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I remember when I was a kid I used to come home from Sunday School and my mother would get drunk and try to make pancakes
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If God is all powerful, can He make a stone so big that He Himself can't lift it?
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I say if you're going to go for the Angel bullshit you might as well go for the Zombie package as well.
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You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.
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The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind that Hitler was elected in a full, free democratic election
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No matter how you care to define it, I do not identify with the local group. Planet, species, race, nation, state, religion, party, union, club, association, neighborhood improvement committee I have no interest in any of it. I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to.
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In the 'bullshit department' a businessman can't hold a candle to a clergyman.
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Religion is sort of like a lift in your shoes. If it makes you feel better, fine. Just don't ask me to wear your shoes.
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It is impossible for an abortion clinic to have a waiting list of more than nine months.
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How old are you? 'I'm four and a half!' You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key.
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As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything.
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I think there's a little more attention to human needs than to property rights. But I don't think much of political activism. It's so shortsighted. Most people are interested in their own personal comfort. I've said that about environmentalists. I think they care about bike paths and places to park their Volvos, not the planet as an abstraction.
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Writing is really wonderful art. A lot of this is discovery. A lot of things are lying around waiting to be discovered and that's our job as writers is to just notice them and bring them to life.
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Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
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Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
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What year did Jesus think it was?
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Boxing is a more sophisticated form of hockey.
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