Quote

If you ask me, we could do with a little less motivation. - The people who are causing all the trouble seem highly motivated to me. - Serial killers, stock swindlers, drug dealers, Christian Republicans.

George Carlin

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Littles
Drug
Dealer
Little
Republican
Causing
People
Seem
Killers
Trouble
Stock
Asks
Motivated
Swindlers
Less
Republicans
Dealers
Christian
Highly
Serial
Seems
Motivation
Serials

More quotes by George Carlin

Image
We kind of shape our truths as we speak them. We fashion things to suit the occasion or the person or our own needs in the moment.
George Carlin
Image
That's the whole meaning of life, isn't it? Trying to find a place for your stuff.
George Carlin
Image
Catholics are against abortions. Catholics are against homosexuals. But, I can't think of anyone who has less abortions than homosexuals!
George Carlin
Image
Hey! Who stole my collection of used bandages?! And they also got away with my nude pictures of Ernest Borgnine!
George Carlin
Image
My advice: Just keep movin' straight ahead. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place.
George Carlin
Image
It's harder to be funny from the position of power.
George Carlin
Image
I've been a performer for a long time and I know when people are laughing from their guts, from the inside, and when their tuxedos are laughing.
George Carlin
Image
You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.
George Carlin
Image
I'm 63 now. But that's just 17 Celsius.
George Carlin
Image
Every day I beat my own previous record for the number of consecutive days I’ve stayed alive.
George Carlin
Image
I never worry that all hell will break loose. My concern is that only part of hell will break loose and be much harder to detect.
George Carlin
Image
If all our national holidays were observed on Wednesdays, we could wind up with nine-day weekends.
George Carlin
Image
Whenever you see the word cuisine used instead of the word food, be prepared to pay an additional eighty percent.
George Carlin
Image
Number one, one, one on wonderful WINO.
George Carlin
Image
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
George Carlin
Image
Avoid people with gold teeth who want to play cards
George Carlin
Image
What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
George Carlin
Image
Can placebos cause side effects? If so, are the side effects real?
George Carlin
Image
Conservatives say if you don't give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. As for the poor, they tell us they've lost all incentive because we've given them too much money.
George Carlin
Image
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.
George Carlin