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A crazy person doesn't really lose his mind. It just becomes something more entertaining.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Crazy
Doesn
Persons
Person
Mind
Entertaining
Something
Lose
Really
Becomes
Loses
More quotes by George Carlin
Language always gives you away.
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I say things that can be defined as prayers. But I don't pray to a power or ask an entity to intercede in the earthly scheme, because I don't believe that happens. But if I see a really unfortunate person in the street, I do pray, yes, though I suppose it's really more like a mantra to ease my own sorrow.
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Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.
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A lot of times when they catch a guy who killed twenty-seven people, they say, He was a loner. Well, of course he was a loner he killed everyone he came in contact with.
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I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
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Life is tough, then you die.
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You can't fight City Hall, but you can goddamn sure blow it up.
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I've never owned a telescope, but it's something I'm thinking of looking into.
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I recently bought a book of free verse. For twelve dollars.
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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
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So I do have this ambivalence. Obviously I'm against militaries, because of what militaries do. In many ways though, the air force was unmilitary-like. They dropped bombs on people, but...they had a golf course.
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Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
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Religion is sort of like a lift in your shoes. If it makes you feel better, fine. Just don't ask me to wear your shoes.
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People who ask Can I ask you a question? Didn't really give me a choice, did ya there buddy?
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God bless the homicidal maniacs. They make life worthwhile.
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If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.
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I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
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Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.
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I was once dancing with a woman who told me she had a yeast infection so I told her to bake me some bread.
George Carlin
