Quote

I gravitated toward being a funny guy. I liked the radio comedians. I lived in the Golden Age of radio, and the Golden Age of television came along when I was still in my early teens.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Funny
Toward
Stills
Lived
Gravitated
Still
Early
Comedians
Along
Teens
Television
Comedian
Came
Golden
Guy
Liked
Age
Radio

More quotes by George Carlin

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Two things happened. The creative side of my career was harmed. When I'd sit down and write under the influence of coke, the ratio of pages kept to pages thrown out declined drastically. But onstage, when rapping about a feeling I already owned, I would sometimes get a burst of eloquence.
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They say if you outlaw guns, only outlaws will have guns. Well, those are precisely the people who need them!
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Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life.
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I hope no one asks me to show them the ropes I have no idea where they are. Maybe I could pull some strings and find out.
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I knew a transsexual guy whose only ambition is to eat, drink, and be Mary.
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Writing books isn't a drastic departure from writing for the stage.
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Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.
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If someone loves you and they leave and don't come back, it was never meant to be. If someone loves you and they leave and come back, set them on fire.
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Every day I beat my own previous record for the number of consecutive days I’ve stayed alive.
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I'm not collegial, I don't hang out. I'm soloist, I like my solitude, I don't really hang around with comedians.
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I recently bought a book of free verse. For twelve dollars.
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You live eighty years, and at best you get about six minutes of pure magic.
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Can placebos cause side effects? If so, are the side effects real?
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How come when it's us, it's an abortion, and when it's a chicken, it's an omelette? Are we so much better than chickens all of a sudden? When did this happen that we passed chickens in goodness? Name six ways we're better than chickens. See, nobody can do it! You know why? 'Cause chickens are decent people.
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Your home is your refuge.
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I say things that can be defined as prayers. But I don't pray to a power or ask an entity to intercede in the earthly scheme, because I don't believe that happens. But if I see a really unfortunate person in the street, I do pray, yes, though I suppose it's really more like a mantra to ease my own sorrow.
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Scientists announced today that they have discovered a cure for apathy. However, they claim no one has shown the slightest interest in it.
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The Human Species could have been great but instead we became satisfied with lights on our tennis shoes.
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We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
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If you ask me, we could do with a little less motivation. - The people who are causing all the trouble seem highly motivated to me. - Serial killers, stock swindlers, drug dealers, Christian Republicans.
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