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If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Drowns
Swimmer
Drown
Humor
Rest
Funny
Synchronized

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Just think, right now as you read this, some guy somewhere is gettin' ready to hang himself.
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You wouldn't know it, from some of the things I've said over the years, but I like people. I do. I like people, but I like them in short bursts. I don't like people for extended periods of time. I'm all right with them for a little while, but once you get up past around... a minute, minute and a half, I gotta get the fuck out of there.
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Don Ho can sign autographs 3.4 times faster than Efrem Zimbalist Jr.
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Sometimes a fireman will go to great strenuous lengths to save a raccoon that's stuck in a drainpipe and then go out on the weekend and kill several of them for amusement.
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If the reason for climbing Mt. Everest is that it's hard to do, why does everyone go up the easy side?
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How come when it's us, it's an abortion, and when it's a chicken, it's an omelette? Are we so much better than chickens all of a sudden? When did this happen that we passed chickens in goodness? Name six ways we're better than chickens. See, nobody can do it! You know why? 'Cause chickens are decent people.
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Some people try to get out of jury duty by lying. You don't have to lie. Tell the judge the truth. Tell him you'd make a terrific juror because you can spot guilty people.
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I don't believe there's any problem in this country, no matter how tough it is, that Americans, when they roll up their sleeves, can't completely ignore.
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Dogs lead a nice life. You never see a dog with a wristwatch.
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Every person you look at, you can see the universe in their eyes, if you're really looking
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You're really spread out now, you've got stuff all over the WORLD! You've got stuff at home, stuff in storage, stuff in Honolulu, stuff in Maui, stuff in your pockets...supply lines are getting longer and harder to maintain.
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When you visualize the recent past, do you see it as being somewhere over on the left?
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I just try to find targets I feel something about and express it my way.
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There are ten thousand people in the United States in a persistent vegetative state. Just enough to start a small town. Think of them as veggie-burghers.
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You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.
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The Christians gave Him Sunday, the Jews gave Him Saturday, and the Muslims gave Him Friday. God has a three-day weekend.
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They say if you outlaw guns, only outlaws will have guns. Well, those are precisely the people who need them!
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I'll tell you a little secret about the Blues: it's not enough to know which notes to play, you have to know why they need to be played.
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Everyone smiles in the same language.
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Baseball is a nineteenth-century pastoral game. Football is a twentieth-century technological struggle.
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