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If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Swimmer
Drown
Humor
Rest
Funny
Synchronized
Drowns

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We spend the early years feeding our brains with information and the latter half trying not to think about it all.
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All the wrong things for all the wrong reasons. Sometimes people just want to feel different. And so long as Third World peasants are poor they will send us drugs, and as long as we are empty we will ask for this little plant.
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I quit school in ninth grade, even though I was good at the studies. I knew I didn't need school for what I wanted.
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There was a built-in audience for the rebel in me that had been all along not expressing himself.
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When you think about it, 12:15 P.M. is actually 11:75 A.M.
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When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' 'He's two' will do just fine. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place.
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Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.
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If a movie is described as a romantic comedy, you can usually find me next door playing pinball.
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I'll tell you a little secret about the Blues: it's not enough to know which notes to play, you have to know why they need to be played.
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I respect animals. I have more sympathy for an injured or dead animal than I do for an injured or dead human being, because human beings participate and cooperate in their own undoing. Animals are completely innocent. There are no innocent human beings.
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You're really spread out now, you've got stuff all over the WORLD! You've got stuff at home, stuff in storage, stuff in Honolulu, stuff in Maui, stuff in your pockets...supply lines are getting longer and harder to maintain.
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People have material needs, but you don't need a deodorant for every different day of the week. You don't need four hundred varieties of mustard. This is what I call too many choices. There are too many choices in America.
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Ah, to be a bird. To fly the skies, sing my song, and best of all occasionally peck someone's eyes out.
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I went to the Missing Persons Bureau but no one was there.
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I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loath and despise the groups they identify or belong to.
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The child molester skipped breakfast, but said he'd grab a little something on the way to work.
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What do dogs do on their day off? Can't lie around – that's their job!
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You're all going to die. I hate to remind you, but it is on your schedule. It probably won't happen when you'd like generally, it's an inconvenience.
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If the reason for climbing Mt. Everest is that it's hard to do, why does everyone go up the easy side?
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When you're born in this world you're given a ticket to the Freak Show. And when you're born in America, you're given a front row seat. And some of us get to sit there with notebooks.
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