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I've been a performer for a long time and I know when people are laughing from their guts, from the inside, and when their tuxedos are laughing.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Guts
Laughing
Inside
Long
Time
People
Tuxedos
Performer
Performers

More quotes by George Carlin

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It seems to me like a perversion of talent for an artist of any kind to further the corporate structure of America or the personal interests of the morons and thieves who run it.
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Baseball is a nineteenth-century pastoral game. Football is a twentieth-century technological struggle.
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Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
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I believe myself to be a worthwhile and inventive performer in my own right. But I'm not in a league with Lenny [Bruce], certainly not in terms of social commentary.
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Whereas your blackness, ethnicity, homosexuality is something that might be genetic, I can't touch that, and I have no right.
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As far as I'm concerned, humans have not yet come up with a belief that's worth believing.
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I remember when I was a kid I used to come home from Sunday School and my mother would get drunk and try to make pancakes
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Comedy is a socially acceptable form of hostility and aggression. That is what comics do, stand the world upside down.
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Interesting form of murder we come up with: Assassination. We assassinate people who've told us to live together in harmony and try to love one another. Apparently we are not ready to live together.
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Dogs and cats get put to sleep hogs and cows get slaughtered.
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Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard
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We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing
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Why should it be illegal to sell something that's perfectly legal to give away?
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There's an idea that the human body is somehow evil and bad and there are parts of it that are especially evil and bad, and we should be ashamed. Fear, guilt and shame are built into the attitude toward sex and the body. It's reflected in these prohibitions and these taboos that we have.
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There are ten thousand people in the United States in a persistent vegetative state. Just enough to start a small town. Think of them as veggie-burghers.
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I think everyone should treat one another in a Christian manner. I will not, however, be responsible for the consequences.
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You know who would make an interesting murder-suicide? Madeline Albright and Yanni.
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It's the old American Double Standard, ya know: Say one thing, do somethin' different. And of course this country is founded on the double standard. That's our history. We were founded on a very basic double standard: This country was founded by slave owners who wanted to be free.
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If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you're gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders.
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I'm 63 now. But that's just 17 Celsius.
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