Quote

I just try to find targets I feel something about and express it my way.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Way
Targets
Target
Express
Find
Feel
Feels
Trying
Something

More quotes by George Carlin

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By elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
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We spend the early years feeding our brains with information and the latter half trying not to think about it all.
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The ritual was very important to me: cleaning the pot, rolling the pot.
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At best, God can be viewed as nothing more than an uncaring incompetent father-figure
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Most of the time people feel okay. Probably it's because at the moment they're not actually dying.
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Bowling is not a sport because you have to rent the shoes. When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops? This title offends all three major religions, and even vegetarians!
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There's a thing about cocaine - when I was doing it secretly, it didn't make me very sociable. I forget how others were, but it made me very inner-directed. So being in a sketch and rehearsing and the hail fellow well met camaraderie and all that stuff, I couldn't fake that or force that. It was painful.
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Sometimes, when I was really loaded, I'd sit on the floor and sort out every nut and bolt in the house. It was just sheer insanity. And often there'd be speed in the cut, so I was a speed freak, too.
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When it comes to bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims: religion... Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do.
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There are battered husbands. Apparently this happens when the woman is real big, the man is very small, and they each drink a quart of whiskey a day.
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There was a built-in audience for the rebel in me that had been all along not expressing himself.
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I knew a transsexual guy whose only ambition is to eat, drink, and be Mary.
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So, have a little fun. Soon enough you'll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family.
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Art, music, and philosophy are merely poignant examples of what we might have been had not the priests and traders gotten hold of us.
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Picture your grandmother in Hell, baking pies... without an oven.
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Life is not that complicated.
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Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
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The next time a prostitute solicits your business, ask for the clergyman's rate.
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Nothing rectifies out-of-control market failures like a healthy dose of government intervention and mountains of bureaucracy.
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If you love someone set them free. If they come back, set them on fire.
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