Quote

I think we overrate ourselves in terms of our abilities and capacities. I mean, just because you can build a really swell bridge doesn't, to my way of thinking, mean that you're an advanced civilization.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Way
Terms
Overrate
Think
Capacity
Swell
Thinking
Civilization
Capacities
Term
Abilities
Ability
Advanced
Doesn
Bridge
Mean
Bridges
Really
Build

More quotes by George Carlin

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The whole problem with the world today: private property. If no one owned anything, it would be a lot better. There's even an entire industry devoted to keeping an eye on other people's stuff. This is how stupid it's got. If you decide to get rid of a lot of your stuff, you can give it to a thrift shop or to Goodwill.
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You can't fight City Hall, but you can goddamn sure blow it up.
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I've never been quarantined. But the more I look around the more I think it might not be a bad idea.
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All music is the blues. All of it.
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I always knew I could hold people's attention and make them laugh every 30 or 40 seconds, and I got approval and attention for that, so the behavior was reinforced. Later, that became an important skill on the street corner.
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Writing books isn't a drastic departure from writing for the stage.
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Pacifism is a nice idea but it can get you killed. We're not there yet. Evolution is slow, small pox is fast.
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As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything.
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If God is all powerful, can He make a stone so big that He Himself can't lift it?
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I call him Governor Bush because that's the only political office he's ever held legally in this country. I don't care where they hang his portrait, I don't care how big his library is. To me, he'll always be Governor Bush. I don't even capitalize his name when I type it anymore.
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I am not a complete vegetarian. I eat only animals that have died in their sleep.
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I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to it.
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So I do have this ambivalence. Obviously I'm against militaries, because of what militaries do. In many ways though, the air force was unmilitary-like. They dropped bombs on people, but...they had a golf course.
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What exactly is 'viewer discretion'? If viewers had discretion, most television shows would not be on the air.
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I have this real moron thing I do? It's called thinking.
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I recently bought a book of free verse. For twelve dollars.
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The planet is fine. The people are f****d. Because everyone is trying to save the planet. The planet doesn’t need that. The planet will take care of itself. People are selfish. And that's what they're doing is trying to save the planet for themselves to have a nicer place to live.
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I finally accepted Jesus. not as my personal savior, but as a man I intend to borrow money from.
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Why do they bother with a suicide watch when someone is on death row? Keep an eye on this guy. We're gonna kill him, and we don't want him to hurt himself.
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When it comes to bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims: religion... Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do.
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