Quote

People who own everything know how to relax a little and bend and exhale once in a while, but they're not going to let it get out of control.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Little
Everything
Going
People
Exhale
Bend
Relax
Control
Littles

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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
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Environmentalists changed the word jungle to rain forest, because no one would give them money to save a jungle. Same with swamps and wetlands.
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If we could just find out who's in charge, we could kill him.
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Sometimes, when I was really loaded, I'd sit on the floor and sort out every nut and bolt in the house. It was just sheer insanity. And often there'd be speed in the cut, so I was a speed freak, too.
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We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.
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There was a built-in audience for the rebel in me that had been all along not expressing himself.
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The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
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Religion is sort of like a lift in your shoes. If it makes you feel better, fine. Just don't ask me to wear your shoes.
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That's the whole meaning of life, isn't it? Trying to find a place for your stuff.
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I'd say pot has been a break-even proposition for me.
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We think in language. The quality of our thoughts and ideas can only be as good as the quality of our language.
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If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
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God bless the homicidal maniacs. They make life worthwhile.
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Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
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Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?
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You can't fight City Hall, but you can goddamn sure blow it up.
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I think we overrate ourselves in terms of our abilities and capacities. I mean, just because you can build a really swell bridge doesn't, to my way of thinking, mean that you're an advanced civilization.
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Dogs lead a nice life. You never see a dog with a wristwatch.
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Cancer research is a growth industry.
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Test of Metal: Will of Iron, Nerves of Steel, Heart of Gold, Balls of Brass.
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