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Sex always has consequences. When Hitler's mother spread her legs that night, she effectively canceled out the spreading of fifteen to twenty million other pairs of legs.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Sex
Fifteen
Millions
Consequences
Mother
Twenty
Night
Twenties
Canceled
Always
Legs
Spreading
Spread
Effectively
Consequence
Hitler
Million
Pairs
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Once the high priests and the traders took over, we were lost as a species.
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If a movie is described as a romantic comedy, you can usually find me next door playing pinball.
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I've never been quarantined. But the more I look around the more I think it might not be a bad idea.
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All the wrong things for all the wrong reasons. Sometimes people just want to feel different. And so long as Third World peasants are poor they will send us drugs, and as long as we are empty we will ask for this little plant.
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Just think, right now as you read this, some guy somewhere is gettin' ready to hang himself.
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Besides the drugs and counterculture, I started talking about myself, which is the first thing you do when you are a writer.
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You know who would make an interesting murder-suicide? Madeline Albright and Yanni.
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I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed.
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I gravitated toward being a funny guy. I liked the radio comedians. I lived in the Golden Age of radio, and the Golden Age of television came along when I was still in my early teens.
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I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen.
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