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My father? My father left when I was quite young. Well actually, he was asked to leave. He had trouble metabolizing alcohol.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Actually
Father
Left
Young
Alcohol
Wells
Asked
Well
Leave
Trouble
Quite
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If someone loves you and they leave and don't come back, it was never meant to be. If someone loves you and they leave and come back, set them on fire.
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I couldn't commit suicide if my life depended on it.
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Just think, right now as you read this, some guy somewhere is gettin' ready to hang himself.
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When he got loaded, the human cannonball knew there were not many men of his caliber.
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It's difficult enough for a young person to put his soul on the line in front of a lot of drunken people without having that hanging over his head, too.
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Give now. Somewhere, someone feels crappy. You can help.
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At best, God can be viewed as nothing more than an uncaring incompetent father-figure
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You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.
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We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
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I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist.
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Religion is just mind control.
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We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.
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If God had intended us not to masturbate, He would have made our arms shorter.
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Surround yourself with what you love.
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The following statement is true. The previous statement is false.
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Being a Dodgers fan led to my first Air Force court-martial, but that's another story.
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