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Broadway isn't a very big career move. There's no money in it and it doesn't mean anything to your career. It's just a nice little jewel in the crown.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Anything
Careers
Little
Move
Mean
Nice
Jewel
Bigs
Crown
Moving
Jewels
Doesn
Crowns
Money
Broadway
Littles
Career

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One thing leads to another? Not always. Sometimes one thing leads to the same thing. Ask an addict.
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Don't confuse my point of view with cynicism. The real cynics are the ones who tell you that everything's gonna be all right.
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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
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When people asked me, Do you get high to go onstage? I could never understand the question. I mean, I'd been high since eight that morning. Going onstage had nothing to do with it.
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In terms of coke, the only money I ever thought about was that dollar bill I had stuck up my nose.
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Soft rock music isn’t rock, and it ain’t music. It’s just soft.
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Why do 'slow down' and 'slow up' mean the same thing? Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
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Art, music, and philosophy are merely poignant examples of what we might have been had not the priests and traders gotten hold of us.
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People say life begins at conception, I say life began about a billion years ago and it's a continuous process.
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I say if you're going to go for the Angel bullshit you might as well go for the Zombie package as well.
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Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that.
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That's why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.
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We kind of shape our truths as we speak them. We fashion things to suit the occasion or the person or our own needs in the moment.
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There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.
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Singing is basically a form of pleasant, controlled screaming.
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The next time a prostitute solicits your business, ask for the clergyman's rate.
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By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
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I hope no one asks me to show them the ropes I have no idea where they are. Maybe I could pull some strings and find out.
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A lot of times when they catch a guy who killed twenty-seven people, they say, He was a loner. Well, of course he was a loner he killed everyone he came in contact with.
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I sort of gave up on this whole human adventure a long time ago, divorced myself from it emotionally. It gives me an artistic detachment that I find valuable. I think the human race has squandered its gift, and I think this country has squandered its promise, for the sake of cell phones and Jet Skis.
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