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Test of Metal: Will of Iron, Nerves of Steel, Heart of Gold, Balls of Brass.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Balls
Tests
Brass
Gold
Metal
Heart
Metals
Steel
Nerves
Iron
Test

More quotes by George Carlin

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People who own everything know how to relax a little and bend and exhale once in a while, but they're not going to let it get out of control.
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We kind of shape our truths as we speak them. We fashion things to suit the occasion or the person or our own needs in the moment.
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The sicker you get, the harder it is to remember if you took your medicine.
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One of the effects it [cocaine] had on my personality - my moods, my behaviors - was that it inhibited me a lot. It kind of took possibilities out of my world, and made the focus of things very narrow.
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I was a stonehead for 30 years. I'd wake up in the morning and if I couldn't decide whether I wanted a joint or not, I'd smoke a joint to figure it out. And I stayed high all day long.
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I don't believe there's any problem in this country, no matter how tough it is, that Americans, when they roll up their sleeves, can't completely ignore.
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When you quit school at an early age, I think you have a lifelong need to show the world - and maybe yourself - that you're really smart after all.
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Running isn't a sport because anyone can do it. Anything we can all do can't be a sport. I can run, you can run. My mother can run, you don't see her on the cover of Sports Illustrated do you?
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As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything.
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Give now. Somewhere, someone feels crappy. You can help.
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How is it possible to have a civil war?
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You're all going to die. I hate to remind you, but it is on your schedule. It probably won't happen when you'd like generally, it's an inconvenience.
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Baseball begins in the spring, the season of new life. Football begins in the fall, when everything's dying.
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Life is a series of dogs.
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Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.
George Carlin
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To me, smoking pot meant sitting with a newspaper on my legs, rolling the seeds down, pulling the twigs out and finally producing a perfectly cylindrical, absolutely wonderful joint that you either locked at both ends or pinched off, or pinched at one end and left open at the other.
George Carlin
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Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
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No one ever says, 'It's only a game' when their team is winning.
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Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
George Carlin
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You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.
George Carlin