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The more syllables a euphemism has, the further divorced from reality it is.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Euphemism
Syllables
Divorced
Reality

More quotes by George Carlin

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The status quo sucks.
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Comedy is a socially acceptable form of hostility and aggression. That is what comics do, stand the world upside down.
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Every day I beat my own previous record for the number of consecutive days I’ve stayed alive.
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For an entertainer, part of the thing you do is just style. And the coke did help me get into great runs of pure form.
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Religion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind.
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Have you ever started a path? No one seems willing to do this. We don't mind using existing paths, but we rarely start new ones. Do it today. Start a path. Even if it doesn't lead anywhere
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We [americans] are not a freedom-loving people in the beautiful, spiritual sense. We have an inspiring Constitution, but we're a hardhearted people.
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The planet isn't going anywhere. We are.
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Life is a zero sum game.
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I used to be Irish Catholic. Now I'm an American - you know, you grow.
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When you quit school at an early age, I think you have a lifelong need to show the world - and maybe yourself - that you're really smart after all.
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It's harder to be funny from the position of power.
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Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
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How is it possible to have a civil war?
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I've been a performer for a long time and I know when people are laughing from their guts, from the inside, and when their tuxedos are laughing.
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I always knew I could hold people's attention and make them laugh every 30 or 40 seconds, and I got approval and attention for that, so the behavior was reinforced. Later, that became an important skill on the street corner.
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Life is not that complicated.
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I don't have to tell you it goes without saying there are some things better left unsaid. I think that speaks for itself. The less said about it the better.
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I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, 'There is no I in team.' What you should tell them is, 'Maybe not. But there is an I in independence, individuality and integrity.
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I think we’re part of a greater wisdom that we will ever understand a higher order, call it what you want. Know what I call it? The Big Electron. It doesn’t punish, it doesn’t reward, it doesn’t judge at all. It just is.
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