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I say if you're going to go for the Angel bullshit you might as well go for the Zombie package as well.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Going
Packages
Zombie
Bullshit
Angel
Atheism
Wells
Might
Well
Package

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I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
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George Washington’s brother, Lawrence, was the Uncle of Our Country.
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Some people try to get out of jury duty by lying. You don't have to lie. Tell the judge the truth. Tell him you'd make a terrific juror because you can spot guilty people.
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Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.
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If you've got a cat and a leg, you've got a happy cat. If you've got a cat and two legs, you've got a party.
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There are ten thousand people in the United States in a persistent vegetative state. Just enough to start a small town. Think of them as veggie-burghers.
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Whenever you see the word cuisine used instead of the word food, be prepared to pay an additional eighty percent.
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Oh Beautiful for smoggy skies, insecticided grain, For strip-mined mountain's majesty above the asphalt plain. America, America, man sheds his waste on thee, And hides the pines with billboard signs, from sea to oily sea.
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Children are not our future, and I can prove it with my usual, flawless logic. Children can't be our future, because by the time the future arrives, they won't be children anymore, so blow me!
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And speaking of sex, the Immaculate Conception does not mean Jesus was conceived in the absence of sex. It means Mary was conceived without Original Sin. That's all it has ever meant. And according to the tabloids, Mary is apparently the only one who can make such a claim. The Jesus thing is called virgin birth.
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Flowers are one of the few things we buy, bring home, watch die, and we don't ask for our money back.
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Grass probably helped me as much as it hurt me. Especially as a performer.
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The US Army has announced that although it is true they performed mind-destroying drug tests on hundreds of soldiers in the 1960s, none of the victims have been promoted beyond the rank of lieutenant colonel.
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Hooray for most things!
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People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.
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If the shoe fits, buy another one just like it.
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Why do they bother saying raw sewage? Do some people actually cook that stuff?
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Can placebos cause side effects? If so, are the side effects real?
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In the 'bullshit department' a businessman can't hold a candle to a clergyman.
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One philosopher has rightly said that property is theft. But I'd like to use my future ownership of property to give something back.
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