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Why do 'slow down' and 'slow up' mean the same thing? Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Time
Watches
Watch
Second
Hand
Called
Hands
Slow
Mean
Third
Thing
Thirds

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A crazy person doesn't really lose his mind. It just becomes something more entertaining.
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Writing is really wonderful art. A lot of this is discovery. A lot of things are lying around waiting to be discovered and that's our job as writers is to just notice them and bring them to life.
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I quit school in ninth grade, even though I was good at the studies. I knew I didn't need school for what I wanted.
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Never let the brain idle. ‘An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.’ And the devil’s name is Alzheimer’s.
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When you look at the average American you realize there's nothing nature enjoys more than a good joke.
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Golf is an arrogant, elitist game that takes up entirely too much space in this country.
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I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
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There are two types of people: One strives to control his environment, the other strives not to let his environment control him. I like to control my environment.
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I hope I'm beginning a new cycle of energy and creativity. If so, it'll really be my third career. The first was as a straight comic in the Sixties. The second was as a counterculture performer in the Seventies. The third will be...well, that's for others to judge.
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I say things that can be defined as prayers. But I don't pray to a power or ask an entity to intercede in the earthly scheme, because I don't believe that happens. But if I see a really unfortunate person in the street, I do pray, yes, though I suppose it's really more like a mantra to ease my own sorrow.
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You take 5 white guys and you take 5 black guys and put em together for a week and what you won't have is 5 blacks guys talking like, 'Golly gee, we really won that big basketball game' but you will have 5 white guys talking like 'Yo slick, whuzzup...we be shootin hoops and mad playin, slammed those mofos
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