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Pacifism is a nice idea but it can get you killed. We're not there yet. Evolution is slow, small pox is fast.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Slow
Fast
Evolution
Small
Nice
Pox
Idea
Pacifism
Ideas
Comedian
Killed
More quotes by George Carlin
People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.
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More people have been killed in the name of God than for any other reason.
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I have this real moron thing I do? It's called thinking.
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The keys to America: The cross, the brew, the dollar, and the gun.
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There are ten thousand people in the United States in a persistent vegetative state. Just enough to start a small town. Think of them as veggie-burghers.
George Carlin
It seems to me like a perversion of talent for an artist of any kind to further the corporate structure of America or the personal interests of the morons and thieves who run it.
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Ah, to be a bird. To fly the skies, sing my song, and best of all occasionally peck someone's eyes out.
George Carlin
If someone loves you and they leave and don't come back, it was never meant to be. If someone loves you and they leave and come back, set them on fire.
George Carlin
Dogs lead a nice life. You never see a dog with a wristwatch.
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Christian Deodorant: Thou Shalt Not Smell
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You wouldn't know it, from some of the things I've said over the years, but I like people. I do. I like people, but I like them in short bursts. I don't like people for extended periods of time. I'm all right with them for a little while, but once you get up past around... a minute, minute and a half, I gotta get the fuck out of there.
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Soft rock music isn’t rock, and it ain’t music. It’s just soft.
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Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.
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The following statement is true. The previous statement is false.
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Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.
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Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.
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The word bipartisan usually means some larger-than-usual deception is being carried out.
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Lenny Bruce genius was the unique ability to investigate hypocrisy and expose social inequities in a street rap that was really a form of poetry.
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Medical researchers have discovered a new disease that has no symptoms. It is impossible to detect, and there is no known cure. Fortunately, no cases have been reported thus far.
George Carlin
Sun worship is fairly simple. There's no mystery, no miracles, no pageantry, no one asks for money, there are no songs to learn, and we don't have a special building where we all gather once a week to pare compare clothing.
George Carlin
