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Scientists announced today that they have discovered a cure for apathy. However, they claim no one has shown the slightest interest in it.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Scientist
Slightest
Claims
Apathy
Shown
However
Cure
Interest
Scientists
Today
Cures
Claim
Discovered
Announced

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Catholics are against abortions. Catholics are against homosexuals. But, I can't think of anyone who has less abortions than homosexuals!
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Every day I break my own personal record for number of days I have been alive.
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The US Army has announced that although it is true they performed mind-destroying drug tests on hundreds of soldiers in the 1960s, none of the victims have been promoted beyond the rank of lieutenant colonel.
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War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class young men off to die. It always has been.
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One of the first things they teach you in Driver's Ed is where to put your hands on the steering wheel. They tell you put 'em at ten o'clock and two o' clock. Never mind that . I put mine at 9:45 and 2:17. Gives me an extra half hour to get where I'm goin'.
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Did you ever look at your watch, and you look away... and you don't know what time it is?
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Nothing rectifies out-of-control market failures like a healthy dose of government intervention and mountains of bureaucracy.
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Anyone who's onstage is going to attract a certain number of misguided people. But I was never very interested in groupies. Instead of thinking about the sex, I'd always think about the clap and the crabs those people have.
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I don't have hobbies hobbies cost money. Interests are quite free.
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I never worry that all hell will break loose. My concern is that only part of hell will break loose and be much harder to detect.
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