Quote

I like Florida. Everything is in the 80s. The temperatures, the ages and the IQ's.

George Carlin

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Ages
Age
Everything
Like
Temperatures
Temperature
Florida

More quotes by George Carlin

Image
I've been a performer for a long time and I know when people are laughing from their guts, from the inside, and when their tuxedos are laughing.
George Carlin
Image
I'm thinking of buying a church and changing it around: maybe selling crack and having a few whores in the pew.
George Carlin
Image
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
George Carlin
Image
When he got loaded, the human cannonball knew there were not many men of his caliber.
George Carlin
Image
Personally, emotionally, I'd rather divorce myself from the world than face the heartbreak of partial success. Because partial success implies overwhelming failure.
George Carlin
Image
As far as I'm concerned, humans have not yet come up with a belief that's worth believing.
George Carlin
Image
If God is all powerful, can He make a stone so big that He Himself can't lift it?
George Carlin
Image
We get what we deserve. They are our elected officials.
George Carlin
Image
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
George Carlin
Image
Military cemeteries around the world are packed with brainwashed dead soldiers who were convinced God was on their side. America prays for God to destroy our enemies. Our enemies pray for God to destroy us. Somebody's gonna be disappointed! Somebody's wasting their time! Could it be.. everyone?
George Carlin
Image
We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
George Carlin
Image
Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life.
George Carlin
Image
I'm certainly a skeptic. I always quibble with people.
George Carlin
Image
Catholic school gave me the tools to reject the very religion they wanted me to have. They taught me how to think for myself and to be independent.
George Carlin
Image
By elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
George Carlin
Image
There are three kinds of people: those who can count, and those who cannot.
George Carlin
Image
Hallucinogens are a value changer...like it or not, it changes your values, it opens up windows (doors of perception.)
George Carlin
Image
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
George Carlin
Image
Religion has what is EASILY the greatest bullshit story of all time.
George Carlin
Image
I try not to see new comics - their acts or their films. Part of that is professional. I don't want to be influenced. But another part is fear and jealousy. I'm afraid to see how good they might be. I don't like that emotion, but it's part of me.
George Carlin