Quote

There are two types of people: One strives to control his environment, the other strives not to let his environment control him. I like to control my environment.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
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Strives
People
Strife
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Strive
Type
Environment
Control
Two

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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
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We get what we deserve. They are our elected officials.
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There are actually people who go out and re-fight these battles. You know what I say? Use real ammunition! You just might raise the intelligence level of the American gene pool!
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The women who line up at a comic's dressing-room door are not what you'd call your class groupies.
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Life is a series of dogs.
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On the other hand, pot opens windows and doors that you may not be able to get through any other way.
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Personally, when it comes to rights, I think one of two things is true. I think either we have unlimited rights, or we have no rights at all. Personally I lean towards unlimited rights, I feel for instance I have the right to do anything I please, BUT! If I do something you don't like I think you have the right to kill me.
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If it requires a uniform, it's a worthless endeavor.
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Ah, to be a bird. To fly the skies, sing my song, and best of all occasionally peck someone's eyes out.
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It was the typical paranoid experience [to hide coke]. As soon as I knew my hiding place, I thought the whole world knew it. I'd write clues to my hiding places in code, then forget the code and spend the rest of the day looking for my coke.
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In Rome, the emperor sat in a special part of the Colosseum called the Caesarian Section.
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You show me a tropical fruit and I'll show you a cocksucker from Guatemala.
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Avoid people with gold teeth who want to play cards
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I like Florida. Everything is in the 80s. The temperatures, the ages and the IQ's.
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Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.
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Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
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A pear is a failed apple.
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Rhetoric paints with a broad brush.
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Christian Deodorant: Thou Shalt Not Smell
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