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Soft rock music isn’t rock, and it ain’t music. It’s just soft.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Funny
Music
Guatemala
Tropical
Soft
Comedian
Rock
Rocks
Humor

More quotes by George Carlin

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I think there's a little more attention to human needs than to property rights. But I don't think much of political activism. It's so shortsighted. Most people are interested in their own personal comfort. I've said that about environmentalists. I think they care about bike paths and places to park their Volvos, not the planet as an abstraction.
George Carlin
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There are two types of people: One strives to control his environment, the other strives not to let his environment control him. I like to control my environment.
George Carlin
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The dividend I get [from my compulsion] is the freedom to be totally disorderly in my dreamworld.
George Carlin
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Instead of thinking about the sex, I'd always think about the clap and the crabs those people have.
George Carlin
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I gravitated toward being a funny guy. I liked the radio comedians. I lived in the Golden Age of radio, and the Golden Age of television came along when I was still in my early teens.
George Carlin
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We think in language. We think in words. Language is the landscape of thought.
George Carlin
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When you visualize the recent past, do you see it as being somewhere over on the left?
George Carlin
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Being a Dodgers fan led to my first Air Force court-martial, but that's another story.
George Carlin
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Why do 'slow down' and 'slow up' mean the same thing? Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
George Carlin
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Hooray for most things!
George Carlin
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More people have been killed in the name of God than for any other reason.
George Carlin
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If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you're gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders.
George Carlin
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If this is the best God can do, I'm not impressed.
George Carlin
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Put two things together which have never been put together before, and some schmuck will buy it.
George Carlin
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Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.
George Carlin
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People who see life as anything more than pure entertainment are missing the point.
George Carlin
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I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
George Carlin
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I just love it when I hear a little commotion, someone leaving. When I see those doors in the back . . .
George Carlin
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It's harder to be funny from the position of power.
George Carlin
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If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea…does that mean that 1 enjoys it?
George Carlin