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The highly motivated people in society are the ones causing all the trouble. It's not the lazy unmotivated folks sitting in front of a TV eating potato chips who bother anyone.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
People
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Potatoes
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Chips
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Motivated
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Ones
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Bother
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Anyone
Folks
Potato
Society
Motivation
Causing
More quotes by George Carlin
People who see life as anything more than pure entertainment are missing the point.
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Nothing rectifies out-of-control market failures like a healthy dose of government intervention and mountains of bureaucracy.
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I'd say pot has been a break-even proposition for me.
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The straightest line between a straight distance is two points.
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Some people try to get out of jury duty by lying. You don't have to lie. Tell the judge the truth. Tell him you'd make a terrific juror because you can spot guilty people.
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If you've got a cat and a leg, you've got a happy cat. If you've got a cat and two legs, you've got a party.
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The whole problem with the world today: private property. If no one owned anything, it would be a lot better. There's even an entire industry devoted to keeping an eye on other people's stuff. This is how stupid it's got. If you decide to get rid of a lot of your stuff, you can give it to a thrift shop or to Goodwill.
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When someone is impatient and says, 'I haven't got all day,' I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?
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Religion is a self-conferred intellectual decision it's not something you get at birth and is unchangeable. You're collusive with the religion when you accept it you have a choice.
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Why should it be illegal to sell something that's perfectly legal to give away?
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I gravitated toward being a funny guy. I liked the radio comedians. I lived in the Golden Age of radio, and the Golden Age of television came along when I was still in my early teens.
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Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
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Do you think Sammy Davis ate Junior Mints?
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Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? It’s because volunteers work for no pay. Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.
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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
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Life is tough, then you die.
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I think it keeps the child alive in me. There's a thrill when you steal something in plain view of other people.
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I don't like the phrase shock value. Surprise is essential in comedy, and if people are shocked by what I consider merely surprising, then that's their shock. But there is no joke without surprise.
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You can't fight City Hall, but you can goddamn sure blow it up.
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Besides the drugs and counterculture, I started talking about myself, which is the first thing you do when you are a writer.
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