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They're only words. You can't be afraid of words that speak the truth, even if it's an unpleasant truth.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Afraid
Words
Speak
Truth
Even
Unpleasant
More quotes by George Carlin
Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.
George Carlin
Sometimes when I'm told to use my own discretion, if no one is looking I'll use someone else's. But I always put it back.
George Carlin
Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?
George Carlin
Did you ever look at your watch, and you look away... and you don't know what time it is?
George Carlin
President George Bush declared a National Day of Prayer for Peace. This was after he had carefully arranged and started the war.
George Carlin
The child molester skipped breakfast, but said he'd grab a little something on the way to work.
George Carlin
I don't like the phrase shock value. Surprise is essential in comedy, and if people are shocked by what I consider merely surprising, then that's their shock. But there is no joke without surprise.
George Carlin
You know who would make an interesting murder-suicide? Madeline Albright and Yanni.
George Carlin
The planet isn't going anywhere. We are.
George Carlin
The surgeon general warned today that saliva causes stomach cancer. But apparently only when swallowed in small amounts over a long period of time.
George Carlin
I have this real moron thing I do? It's called thinking.
George Carlin
I call him Governor Bush because that's the only political office he's ever held legally in this country. I don't care where they hang his portrait, I don't care how big his library is. To me, he'll always be Governor Bush. I don't even capitalize his name when I type it anymore.
George Carlin
When I hear a person talking about political solutions, I know I am not listening to a serious person.
George Carlin
I don't have hobbies hobbies cost money. Interests are quite free.
George Carlin
You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.
George Carlin
For a long time, I've distinguished between entertainer and performer and entertainer and artist. To me, an entertainer is someone who pleases others, and an artist tries to please himself.
George Carlin
I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
George Carlin
I'm sure Hitler was great with his family.
George Carlin
People who own everything know how to relax a little and bend and exhale once in a while, but they're not going to let it get out of control.
George Carlin
Why should it be illegal to sell something that's perfectly legal to give away?
George Carlin
