Quote

The good lord tripped me up behind the line of scrimmage.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Line
Behinds
Behind
Lines
Lord
Good
Scrimmage
Tripped

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I think we overrate ourselves in terms of our abilities and capacities. I mean, just because you can build a really swell bridge doesn't, to my way of thinking, mean that you're an advanced civilization.
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If a movie is described as a romantic comedy, you can usually find me next door playing pinball.
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Religion has what is EASILY the greatest bullshit story of all time.
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The secretiveness. The stealth. Those were obviously the aspects of cocaine use I was addicted to.
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It's difficult enough for a young person to put his soul on the line in front of a lot of drunken people without having that hanging over his head, too.
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I'm in favor of personal growth as long as it doesn't include malignant tumors.
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I believe my first duty is to survive. And I'm not just talking about criminals coming into my home. I once seriously considered getting a gun to protect myself from the police. If I need a weapon to continue living, I'll get one. And I'll use it.
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There's a thrill when you steal something in plain view of other people. When you drop a newspaper over a sign and walk away with it, or take something off a wall and the sound of the glue ripping makes people turn around. Your heart is racing, it's a rush.
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Pacifism is a nice idea but it can get you killed. We're not there yet. Evolution is slow, small pox is fast.
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Comedy is a socially acceptable form of hostility and aggression. That is what comics do, stand the world upside down.
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Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.
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As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything.
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