Quote

When you're born in this world you're given a ticket to the Freak Show. And when you're born in America, you're given a front row seat. And some of us get to sit there with notebooks.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Front
Ticket
Show
Notebook
Born
Tickets
Given
Seat
Shows
Freak
America
Seats
World
Genuine
Fronts
Notebooks

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Pacifism is a nice idea but it can get you killed. We're not there yet. Evolution is slow, small pox is fast.
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Lenny Bruce genius was the unique ability to investigate hypocrisy and expose social inequities in a street rap that was really a form of poetry.
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Every day I beat my own previous record for the number of consecutive days I’ve stayed alive.
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How old are you? 'I'm four and a half!' You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key.
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If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?
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One philosopher has rightly said that property is theft. But I'd like to use my future ownership of property to give something back.
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People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.
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Being a Dodgers fan led to my first Air Force court-martial, but that's another story.
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The sicker you get, the harder it is to remember if you took your medicine.
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Religion cruelly exploits our need to feel connected.
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You show me something that doesn't cause cancer, and I'll show you something that isn't on the market yet.
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Can placebos cause side effects? If so, are the side effects real?
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The mayfly lives only one day. And sometimes it rains.
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What I hated most was seeing those priests and brothers getting so much pleasure out of inflicting pain. I wondered what was wrong with them.
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What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
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Whereas your blackness, ethnicity, homosexuality is something that might be genetic, I can't touch that, and I have no right.
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Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.
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Test of Metal: Will of Iron, Nerves of Steel, Heart of Gold, Balls of Brass.
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Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
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The good lord tripped me up behind the line of scrimmage.
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