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Every person you look at, you can see the universe in their eyes, if you're really looking

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Universe
Humorists
Persons
Comedian
Person
Genuine
Look
Seeing
Looks
Eyes
Every
Looking
Really
People
Eye

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We [americans] are not a freedom-loving people in the beautiful, spiritual sense. We have an inspiring Constitution, but we're a hardhearted people.
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A crazy person doesn't really lose his mind. It just becomes something more entertaining.
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Irony deals with opposites it has nothing to do with coincidence.
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Sex always has consequences. When Hitler's mother spread her legs that night, she effectively canceled out the spreading of fifteen to twenty million other pairs of legs.
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Why should it be illegal to sell something that's perfectly legal to give away?
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We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
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By the age of six or seven, I was already doing voices and faces, making my friends and my mother laugh.
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There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.
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Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
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There's this man who lives in the sky, and he has ten things he doesn't want you to do, and you'll burn for a long time if you do them. But he loves you.
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The word bipartisan usually means some larger-than-usual deception is being carried out.
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I believe myself to be a worthwhile and inventive performer in my own right. [And] I want to be known for what I do best.
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The base of evil in the world is religion of any kind
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I say things that can be defined as prayers. But I don't pray to a power or ask an entity to intercede in the earthly scheme, because I don't believe that happens. But if I see a really unfortunate person in the street, I do pray, yes, though I suppose it's really more like a mantra to ease my own sorrow.
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The dividend I get [from my compulsion] is the freedom to be totally disorderly in my dreamworld.
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When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.
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