Quote

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Milk
Wrong
Aging
Turns
Throw
Sound
Turned
Makes
Fun
Like
Changed
Turn
Dumplings
Sour
Happened

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When people asked me, Do you get high to go onstage? I could never understand the question. I mean, I'd been high since eight that morning. Going onstage had nothing to do with it.
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Golf is an arrogant, elitist game that takes up entirely too much space in this country.
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My advice: Just keep movin' straight ahead. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place.
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The enjoyment has been diminishing. Now, there's no question that it's sort of fun to get high.
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Environmentalists changed the word jungle to rain forest, because no one would give them money to save a jungle. Same with swamps and wetlands.
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You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.
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The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind that Hitler was elected in a full, free democratic election
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One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
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The New Testament is not new anymore' it's thousands of years old. It's time to start calling it the Less Old Testament.
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If drumsticks are for playing drums, you would think that breadsticks would be for playing bread, wouldn't you? Would you like some breadsticks? No, thank you, I don't play bread. I play drums. Perhaps I'll have a drum roll.
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