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Sun worship is fairly simple. There's no mystery, no miracles, no pageantry, no one asks for money, there are no songs to learn, and we don't have a special building where we all gather once a week to pare compare clothing.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Building
Fairly
Week
Compare
Special
Humorous
Pare
Asks
Miracle
Pageantry
Simple
Worship
Gather
Learn
Sun
Clothings
Song
Songs
Clothing
Money
Mystery
Miracles
More quotes by George Carlin
There are three kinds of people: those who can count, and those who cannot.
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Hooray for most things!
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Nothing you see on the Internet is mine unless it comes from one of my albums, books, HBO specials, or appeared on my website.
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I definitely have a gift for language that is rhythmic and attractive to the ear, and I have interesting [verbal] imagery which I guess is a poetic touch.
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More people have been killed in the name of God than for any other reason.
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All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another
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Ah, to be a bird. To fly the skies, sing my song, and best of all occasionally peck someone's eyes out.
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I simply decided that dope wasn't worth the ritual.
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We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life, not life to years.
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Running isn't a sport because anyone can do it. Anything we can all do can't be a sport. I can run, you can run. My mother can run, you don't see her on the cover of Sports Illustrated do you?
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Anyone who's onstage is going to attract a certain number of misguided people. But I was never very interested in groupies. Instead of thinking about the sex, I'd always think about the clap and the crabs those people have.
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Whereas your blackness, ethnicity, homosexuality is something that might be genetic, I can't touch that, and I have no right.
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What occurs as you age is an accumulation of information, data, knowledge, and what I'm going to call the matrix of the mind. There's just a rich, textured, field of information and impressions that have been all networked by the brain.
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We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing
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If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.
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Children are not our future, and I can prove it with my usual, flawless logic. Children can't be our future, because by the time the future arrives, they won't be children anymore, so blow me!
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How can He be perfect? Everything He ever makes...dies.
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George Washington’s brother, Lawrence, was the Uncle of Our Country.
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Why don't they have waiters in waiting rooms?
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When someone is impatient and says, 'I haven't got all day,' I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?
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