Quote

I should think it takes a fairly low intellect to draw pleasure from the following activity: hitting a ball with a crooked stick. and then walking after it! An then ..hitting it again!

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Walking
Sticks
Takes
Draw
Pleasure
Intellect
Crooked
Think
Balls
Fairly
Thinking
Lows
Hitting
Draws
Stick
Following
Humorous
Activity
Ball

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Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
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The phrase surgical strike might be more acceptable if it were common practice to perform surgery with high explosives.
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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
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I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.
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How can He be perfect? Everything He ever makes...dies.
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People love to admit they have bad handwriting or that they can't do math. And they will readily admit to being awkward: 'I'm such a klutz!' But they will never admit to having a poor sense of humor or being a bad driver.
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I've never owned a telescope, but it's something I'm thinking of looking into.
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I believe myself to be a worthwhile and inventive performer in my own right. But I'm not in a league with Lenny [Bruce], certainly not in terms of social commentary.
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You show me something that doesn't cause cancer, and I'll show you something that isn't on the market yet.
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Sometimes when I'm told to use my own discretion, if no one is looking I'll use someone else's. But I always put it back.
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A crazy person doesn't really lose his mind. It just becomes something more entertaining.
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I don't like the phrase shock value. Surprise is essential in comedy, and if people are shocked by what I consider merely surprising, then that's their shock. But there is no joke without surprise.
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I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loath and despise the groups they identify or belong to.
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War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class young men off to die. It always has been.
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I find that an entertainer is quite content to sit still, and I think an artist always has a little motion, always going somewhere. May not know where it is, but there is some sort of unnamed destination. There is some pulling, some movement. So I just found myself in that category according to my own analysis.
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On Thanksgiving, you realize you're living in a modern world. Millions of turkeys baste themselves in millions of ovens that clean themselves.
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We get what we deserve. They are our elected officials.
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