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If the reason for climbing Mt. Everest is that it's hard to do, why does everyone go up the easy side?

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Doe
Reason
Everest
Hard
Climbing
Humorous
Side
Sides
Everyone
Easy

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People who ask Can I ask you a question? Didn't really give me a choice, did ya there buddy?
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That's the whole meaning of life, isn't it? Trying to find a place for your stuff.
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When I hear a person talking about political solutions, I know I am not listening to a serious person.
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By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
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The future will soon be a thing of the past.
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You know who would make an interesting murder-suicide? Madeline Albright and Yanni.
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I think of myself as an entertainer: I'm a performing entertainer, I'm a stand-up comic. But there's an artist at work here, too. One who interprets his world through his own filter.
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I call him Governor Bush because that's the only political office he's ever held legally in this country. I don't care where they hang his portrait, I don't care how big his library is. To me, he'll always be Governor Bush. I don't even capitalize his name when I type it anymore.
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If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you're gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders.
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I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
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I had no shoes, and I felt sorry for myself until I met a man who had no feet. I took his shoes. Now I feel better.
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I'll bet there aren't too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes.
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No one who has had Taps played for them has ever been able to hear it.
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So far, this is the oldest I've been.
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You're all going to die. I hate to remind you, but it is on your schedule. It probably won't happen when you'd like generally, it's an inconvenience.
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Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky.
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