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One great thing about getting old is that you can get out of all sorts of social obligations just by saying you're too tired.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Great
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Thing
Tired
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Getting
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Comedian

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Art, music, and philosophy are merely poignant examples of what we might have been had not the priests and traders gotten hold of us.
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You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.
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People who see life as anything more than pure entertainment are missing the point.
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I think it keeps the child alive in me. There's a thrill when you steal something in plain view of other people.
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To my surprise, my marijuana use has been tapering off steadily.
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It seems to me like a perversion of talent for an artist of any kind to further the corporate structure of America or the personal interests of the morons and thieves who run it.
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No matter how you care to define it, I do not identify with the local group. Planet, species, race, nation, state, religion, party, union, club, association, neighborhood improvement committee I have no interest in any of it. I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to.
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Writing is really wonderful art. A lot of this is discovery. A lot of things are lying around waiting to be discovered and that's our job as writers is to just notice them and bring them to life.
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I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
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Language always gives you away.
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I think we overrate ourselves in terms of our abilities and capacities. I mean, just because you can build a really swell bridge doesn't, to my way of thinking, mean that you're an advanced civilization.
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I never joined the Boy Scouts. I don't trust any organization that has a handbook.
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There's this man who lives in the sky, and he has ten things he doesn't want you to do, and you'll burn for a long time if you do them. But he loves you.
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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
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