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We spend the early years feeding our brains with information and the latter half trying not to think about it all.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Brain
Half
Feeding
Trying
Brains
Years
Latter
Think
Yoga
Thinking
Early
Spend
Information
More quotes by George Carlin
Hitler never bothered with restaurant reservations he just dropped by. And somehow they always found him a table.
George Carlin
I don't get all choked up about yellow ribbons and American flags. I see them as symbols, and I leave them to the symbol-minded.
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There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.
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In baseball the object is to go home! And to be safe! - I hope I'll be safe at home!
George Carlin
You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.
George Carlin
It is impossible for an abortion clinic to have a waiting list of more than nine months.
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It's depressing to see blacks wanting to dive into the mainstream of American commercial life. They come from a magnificent African culture based on aesthetics, and they all want to become fort builders like the vicious people who originally enslaved them.
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The wisest man I ever knew taught me something I never forgot. And although I never forgot it, I never quite memorized it either. So what I’m left with is the memory of having learned something very wise that I can’t quite remember.
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Being a Dodgers fan led to my first Air Force court-martial, but that's another story.
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There are three kinds of people: those who can count, and those who cannot.
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Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.
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The status quo sucks.
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Give now. Somewhere, someone feels crappy. You can help.
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People get all upset about torture, but when you get right down to it, it's really a pretty good way of finding out something a person doesn't want you to know.
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The highly motivated people in society are the ones causing all the trouble. It's not the lazy unmotivated folks sitting in front of a TV eating potato chips who bother anyone.
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We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.
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I recently bought a book of free verse. For twelve dollars.
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In the doggie dictionary, under bow wow it says, See arf arf.
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I believe you can joke about anything.
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That's the whole meaning of life, isn't it? Trying to find a place for your stuff.
George Carlin
