Quote

I think we’re part of a greater wisdom that we will ever understand a higher order, call it what you want. Know what I call it? The Big Electron. It doesn’t punish, it doesn’t reward, it doesn’t judge at all. It just is.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Ever
Wisdom
Electron
Think
Call
Electrons
Thinking
Greater
Punish
Bigs
Reward
Understand
Rewards
Doesn
Judge
Order
Judging
Part
Higher

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Most of the time people feel okay. Probably it's because at the moment they're not actually dying.
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Dogs and cats get put to sleep hogs and cows get slaughtered.
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As far as I'm concerned, humans have not yet come up with a belief that's worth believing.
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More people have been killed in the name of God than for any other reason.
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God bless the homicidal maniacs. They make life worthwhile.
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A pear is a failed apple.
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Somewhere in the world is a doctor who is worse than all other doctors...and someone has an appointment with him in the morning.
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My advice: Just keep movin' straight ahead. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place.
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Life is not that complicated.
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I was once dancing with a woman who told me she had a yeast infection so I told her to bake me some bread.
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Thall shall keep thy religion to thy selves.
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Leftovers make you feel good twice. First, when you put it away, you feel thrifty and intelligent: 'I'm saving food!' Then a month later when blue hair is growing out of the ham, and you throw it away, you feel really intelligent: 'I'm saving my life!'
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If all our national holidays were observed on Wednesdays, we could wind up with nine-day weekends.
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I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.
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It's harder to be funny from the position of power.
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There is nothing wrong with the planet. The planet is fine ... been here 4 1/2 billion years. We've been here, what, a 100,000 years, maybe 200,000. And we've only been engaged in heavy industry a little over 200 years. 200 years versus 4 1/2 billion. And we have the conceit to think that somehow we're a threat? The planet isn't going away. We are.
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We [americans] are not a freedom-loving people in the beautiful, spiritual sense. We have an inspiring Constitution, but we're a hardhearted people.
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You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.
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My left descending septal branch artery decided to close without consultation with any of my other organs. It happened on Saint Patrick's Day, 1978.
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What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
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