Quote

I'll tell you a little secret about the Blues: it's not enough to know which notes to play, you have to know why they need to be played.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Secret
Tell
Littles
Little
Play
Need
Blues
Enough
Notes
Needs
Played

More quotes by George Carlin

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Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that's twice as big as it needs to be.
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There's a humorous side to every situation. The challenge is to find it.
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I sort of gave up on this whole human adventure a long time ago, divorced myself from it emotionally. It gives me an artistic detachment that I find valuable. I think the human race has squandered its gift, and I think this country has squandered its promise, for the sake of cell phones and Jet Skis.
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Put two things together which have never been put together before, and some schmuck will buy it.
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Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
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I profess no belief in God, which by definition is true, especially if we take the accepted definition of God. But to be an atheist is to also have a belief, and have a system, and I don't know that I like that either.
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Life is tough, then you die.
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Conservatives say if you don't give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. As for the poor, they tell us they've lost all incentive because we've given them too much money.
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Religion is a self-conferred intellectual decision it's not something you get at birth and is unchangeable. You're collusive with the religion when you accept it you have a choice.
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I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, 'There is no I in team.' What you should tell them is, 'Maybe not. But there is an I in independence, individuality and integrity.
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Don Ho can sign autographs 3.4 times faster than Efrem Zimbalist Jr.
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If the shoe fits, buy another one just like it.
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I think we overrate ourselves in terms of our abilities and capacities. I mean, just because you can build a really swell bridge doesn't, to my way of thinking, mean that you're an advanced civilization.
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What I hated most was seeing those priests and brothers getting so much pleasure out of inflicting pain. I wondered what was wrong with them.
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We think in language. The quality of our thoughts and ideas can only be as good as the quality of our language.
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Before they give you a lethal injection, they swab your arm with alcohol. It's true. Well, they don't want you to get an infection, and you can see their point. They don't want some guy go to hell and be sick.
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You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.
George Carlin
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I was a stonehead for 30 years. I'd wake up in the morning and if I couldn't decide whether I wanted a joint or not, I'd smoke a joint to figure it out. And I stayed high all day long.
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If the reason for climbing Mt. Everest is that it's hard to do, why does everyone go up the easy side?
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Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.
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