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All music is the blues. All of it.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Blues
Music

More quotes by George Carlin

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Running isn't a sport because anyone can do it. Anything we can all do can't be a sport. I can run, you can run. My mother can run, you don't see her on the cover of Sports Illustrated do you?
George Carlin
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Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.
George Carlin
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When he got loaded, the human cannonball knew there were not many men of his caliber.
George Carlin
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We now buy watches primarily for their looks, price, or additional functions. The fact that they tell time seems lost.
George Carlin
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Leftovers make you feel good twice. First, when you put it away, you feel thrifty and intelligent: 'I'm saving food!' Then a month later when blue hair is growing out of the ham, and you throw it away, you feel really intelligent: 'I'm saving my life!'
George Carlin
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It is impossible for an abortion clinic to have a waiting list of more than nine months.
George Carlin
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Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did.
George Carlin
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When I first heard the song Don't worry - be happy I realized it was exactly the kind of mindless philosophy that Americans would respond to. It would make a great national anthem along with Me first.
George Carlin
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We created god in our own image and likeness!
George Carlin
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Sometimes when I'm told to use my own discretion, if no one is looking I'll use someone else's. But I always put it back.
George Carlin
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Here's a phrase that apparently the airlines simply made up: near miss. They say that if 2 planes almost collide, it's a near miss. Bullshit, my friend. It's a near hit! A collision is a near miss. [WHAM! CRUNCH!] Look, they nearly missed! Yes, but not quite.
George Carlin
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Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?
George Carlin
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It's a keep your fingers crossed business, the entertainment business.
George Carlin
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Why do 'slow down' and 'slow up' mean the same thing? Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
George Carlin
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Do you know the nicest thing about looking at pictures of a 1950's baseball park? The only people wearing baseball caps are the players.
George Carlin
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Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.
George Carlin
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Anger is a handy term and words are tricky, as we know. What one man perceives as anger, another person - in my case the deliverer of material - is, Don't you see it, don't you see how badly you're doing? It's like shaking a child - which you're not supposed to do.
George Carlin
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Dogs lead a nice life. You never see a dog with a wristwatch.
George Carlin
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Golf is an arrogant, elitist game that takes up entirely too much space in this country.
George Carlin
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Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
George Carlin