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Conservatives say if you don't give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. As for the poor, they tell us they've lost all incentive because we've given them too much money.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
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Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Lose
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Give
Loses
Giving
Rich
Much
Poor
Incentive
Lost
Incentives
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Conservatives
Tell
Invest
Money
More quotes by George Carlin
If God didn't want you to masturbate, he would have given you short arms.
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My father? My father left when I was quite young. Well actually, he was asked to leave. He had trouble metabolizing alcohol.
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The next time a prostitute solicits your business, ask for the clergyman's rate.
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Dogs lead a nice life. You never see a dog with a wristwatch.
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Picture your grandmother in Hell, baking pies... without an oven.
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I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.
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When it comes to bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims: religion... Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do.
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In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.
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Ah, to be a bird. To fly the skies, sing my song, and best of all occasionally peck someone's eyes out.
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The status quo sucks.
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If God is all powerful, can He make a stone so big that He Himself can't lift it?
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They're only words. You can't be afraid of words that speak the truth, even if it's an unpleasant truth.
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In Rome, the emperor sat in a special part of the Colosseum called the Caesarian Section.
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Flowers are one of the few things we buy, bring home, watch die, and we don't ask for our money back.
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There is nothing wrong with the planet. The planet is fine ... been here 4 1/2 billion years. We've been here, what, a 100,000 years, maybe 200,000. And we've only been engaged in heavy industry a little over 200 years. 200 years versus 4 1/2 billion. And we have the conceit to think that somehow we're a threat? The planet isn't going away. We are.
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Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life.
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Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
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Give now. Somewhere, someone feels crappy. You can help.
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If you love someone set them free. If they come back, set them on fire.
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Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
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