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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Groups
Stupid
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Nature
Underestimate
Power
Stupidity
Never
Intelligence
People
Large
Advice
More quotes by George Carlin
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loath and despise the groups they identify or belong to.
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I just try to find targets I feel something about and express it my way.
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A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.
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The child molester skipped breakfast, but said he'd grab a little something on the way to work.
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Don Ho can sign autographs 3.4 times faster than Efrem Zimbalist Jr.
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I gravitated toward being a funny guy. I liked the radio comedians. I lived in the Golden Age of radio, and the Golden Age of television came along when I was still in my early teens.
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Regarding local residents attempting to ban sex shops from their neighborhoods: You show me a parent who says he's worried about his child's innocence and I'll show you a homeowner trying to maintain equity.
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When it comes to bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims: religion... Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do.
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I had no shoes, and I felt sorry for myself until I met a man who had no feet. I took his shoes. Now I feel better.
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The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.
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Hallucinogens are a value changer...like it or not, it changes your values, it opens up windows (doors of perception.)
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I say things that can be defined as prayers. But I don't pray to a power or ask an entity to intercede in the earthly scheme, because I don't believe that happens. But if I see a really unfortunate person in the street, I do pray, yes, though I suppose it's really more like a mantra to ease my own sorrow.
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Besides the drugs and counterculture, I started talking about myself, which is the first thing you do when you are a writer.
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I was once dancing with a woman who told me she had a yeast infection so I told her to bake me some bread.
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Never get on an airplane if the pilot is wearing a hat that has more than three pastel colors.
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But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?
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The base of evil in the world is religion of any kind
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Catholic school gave me the tools to reject the very religion they wanted me to have. They taught me how to think for myself and to be independent.
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Just think, right now as you read this, some guy somewhere is gettin' ready to hang himself.
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Why do they bother saying raw sewage? Do some people actually cook that stuff?
George Carlin
