Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
The Human Species could have been great but instead we became satisfied with lights on our tennis shoes.
George Carlin
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Human
Lights
Humans
Tennis
Great
Satisfied
Shoes
Species
Became
Instead
Light
More quotes by George Carlin
What year did Jesus think it was?
George Carlin
So, have a little fun. Soon enough you'll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family.
George Carlin
The child molester skipped breakfast, but said he'd grab a little something on the way to work.
George Carlin
I, myself, have killed six people. All random, all undetected, no way to trace them to me. And, let me tell you, there's nothin' like it. It's a great feeling. Yeah, I know, you're thinking. 'Aw, he's a comedian. He's just sayin' that stuff.' Good. That's exactly what I want you to think.
George Carlin
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
George Carlin
I think self-expression is present at all times, and whether or not you're talking about the outside world or your responses to it depends on the moment and the subject.
George Carlin
Language always gives you away.
George Carlin
As powerful as anyone may claim God to be, somehow he always needs money.
George Carlin
No one is more himself than the moment when he's laughing at a joke. It's at those moments that people's defenses go down, and that's when you can slip in a good idea.
George Carlin
First I was a mimic. Practically from the moment I began talking, I did impersonations of the people in my neighborhood - the storekeepers, the policemen, my teachers.
George Carlin
Grass probably helped me as much as it hurt me. Especially as a performer.
George Carlin
When he got loaded, the human cannonball knew there were not many men of his caliber.
George Carlin
Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did.
George Carlin
To my surprise, my marijuana use has been tapering off steadily.
George Carlin
Thall shall keep thy religion to thy selves.
George Carlin
Don Ho can sign autographs 3.4 times faster than Efrem Zimbalist Jr.
George Carlin
When you quit school at an early age, I think you have a lifelong need to show the world - and maybe yourself - that you're really smart after all.
George Carlin
The women who line up at a comic's dressing-room door are not what you'd call your class groupies.
George Carlin
That's the whole meaning of life, isn't it? Trying to find a place for your stuff.
George Carlin
I think everyone should treat one another in a Christian manner. I will not, however, be responsible for the consequences.
George Carlin
