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I don't have to tell you it goes without saying there are some things better left unsaid. I think that speaks for itself. The less said about it the better.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Unsaid
Better
Speaks
Without
Goes
Things
Saying
Think
Less
Thinking
Speak
Left
Tell

More quotes by George Carlin

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People have material needs, but you don't need a deodorant for every different day of the week. You don't need four hundred varieties of mustard. This is what I call too many choices. There are too many choices in America.
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Personally, when it comes to rights, I think one of two things is true. I think either we have unlimited rights, or we have no rights at all. Personally I lean towards unlimited rights, I feel for instance I have the right to do anything I please, BUT! If I do something you don't like I think you have the right to kill me.
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I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loath and despise the groups they identify or belong to.
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We kind of shape our truths as we speak them. We fashion things to suit the occasion or the person or our own needs in the moment.
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Why should it be illegal to sell something that's perfectly legal to give away?
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Baseball is a nineteenth-century pastoral game. Football is a twentieth-century technological struggle.
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People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.
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That's the whole meaning of life, isn't it? Trying to find a place for your stuff.
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You show me a tropical fruit and I'll show you a cocksucker from Guatemala.
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If the cops didn't see it, I didn't do it!
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It seems to me like a perversion of talent for an artist of any kind to further the corporate structure of America or the personal interests of the morons and thieves who run it.
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It's all bullshit, folks and it's bad for ya.
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There are two types of people: One strives to control his environment, the other strives not to let his environment control him. I like to control my environment, because I feel if I have my physical space in order, then I'm free to dream.
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The straightest line between a straight distance is two points.
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I was a hip kid. When I saw Bambi it was the midnight show.
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Why do they bother saying raw sewage? Do some people actually cook that stuff?
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We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing
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I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.
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When I first heard the song Don't worry - be happy I realized it was exactly the kind of mindless philosophy that Americans would respond to. It would make a great national anthem along with Me first.
George Carlin
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I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed.
George Carlin