Quote

There are women named Faith, Hope, Joy, and Prudence. Why not Despair, Guilt, Rage, and Grief? It seems only right. 'Tom, I'd like you to meet the girl of my dreams, Tragedy.' These days, Trajedi.

George Carlin

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Faith
Guilt
Hope
Tragedy
Girl
Despair
Dream
Grief
Seems
Meet
Toms
Women
Dreams
Prudence
Right
Joy
Named
Like
Days
Rage

More quotes by George Carlin

Image
Nothing rectifies out-of-control market failures like a healthy dose of government intervention and mountains of bureaucracy.
George Carlin
Image
I'll bet there aren't too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes.
George Carlin
Image
I went to the Missing Persons Bureau but no one was there.
George Carlin
Image
Every person you look at, you can see the universe in their eyes, if you're really looking
George Carlin
Image
Leftovers make you feel good twice. First, when you put it away, you feel thrifty and intelligent: 'I'm saving food!' Then a month later when blue hair is growing out of the ham, and you throw it away, you feel really intelligent: 'I'm saving my life!'
George Carlin
Image
It's depressing to see blacks wanting to dive into the mainstream of American commercial life. They come from a magnificent African culture based on aesthetics, and they all want to become fort builders like the vicious people who originally enslaved them.
George Carlin
Image
Once the high priests and the traders took over, we were lost as a species.
George Carlin
Image
Art, music, and philosophy are merely poignant examples of what we might have been had not the priests and traders gotten hold of us.
George Carlin
Image
I think I am, therefore, I am... I think.
George Carlin
Image
If the shoe fits, buy another one just like it.
George Carlin
Image
If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know? If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words? Why is 'phonics' not spelled the way it sounds? How come abbreviated is such a long word?
George Carlin
Image
We created god in our own image and likeness!
George Carlin
Image
That's the whole meaning of life, isn't it? Trying to find a place for your stuff.
George Carlin
Image
Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life.
George Carlin
Image
One philosopher has rightly said that property is theft. But I'd like to use my future ownership of property to give something back.
George Carlin
Image
I profess no belief in God, which by definition is true, especially if we take the accepted definition of God. But to be an atheist is to also have a belief, and have a system, and I don't know that I like that either.
George Carlin
Image
I couldn't commit suicide if my life depended on it.
George Carlin
Image
I always knew I could hold people's attention and make them laugh every 30 or 40 seconds, and I got approval and attention for that, so the behavior was reinforced. Later, that became an important skill on the street corner.
George Carlin
Image
If you live long enough, sooner or later everybody you know has cancer.
George Carlin
Image
I kind of like it when a lot of people die, and on the other hand I always wonder how many unused frequent-flier miles they had.
George Carlin