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Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Women
Men
Love
Deal
Deals
Funny
Earth

More quotes by George Carlin

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I was once dancing with a woman who told me she had a yeast infection so I told her to bake me some bread.
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In the 'bullshit department' a businessman can't hold a candle to a clergyman.
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The planet isn't going anywhere. We are.
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I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen.
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I'd say pot has been a break-even proposition for me.
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So, have a little fun. Soon enough you'll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family.
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Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
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I can remember staring at the orphanage and feeling envy.
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The ritual was very important to me: cleaning the pot, rolling the pot.
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In terms of coke, the only money I ever thought about was that dollar bill I had stuck up my nose.
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The sicker you get, the harder it is to remember if you took your medicine.
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I never worry that all hell will break loose. My concern is that only part of hell will break loose and be much harder to detect.
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I used to be Irish Catholic. Now I'm an American - you know, you grow.
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Surround yourself with what you love.
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It's a keep your fingers crossed business, the entertainment business.
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No one is more himself than the moment when he's laughing at a joke. It's at those moments that people's defenses go down, and that's when you can slip in a good idea.
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I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, 'There is no I in team.' What you should tell them is, 'Maybe not. But there is an I in independence, individuality and integrity.
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Suppose I could shoot myself in the mouth, but what if I miss? People will laugh at me.
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Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established.
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Cancer research is a growth industry.
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