Quote

When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Work
Worked
Lamp
Much
Late
Thomas
Made
Seem
Lamps
Comedy
Urgent
Sure
Gas
Night
Candle
Light
Electric
Seems
Genuine
Edison

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It is said that Indians were sometimes named for the first thing they saw when they were born. Makes you wonder why there aren't more Indians named Hairy Pussy, doesn't it?
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They say that instead of cursing the darkness, one should light a candle. Nothing is mentioned, though, about cursing a lack of candles.
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The New Testament is not new anymore' it's thousands of years old. It's time to start calling it the Less Old Testament.
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Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backward.
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I think we overrate ourselves in terms of our abilities and capacities. I mean, just because you can build a really swell bridge doesn't, to my way of thinking, mean that you're an advanced civilization.
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Shopping and buying and getting and having comprise the Great American Addiction. No one is immune. When the underclass riots in this country they don't kill policemen and politicians, they steal merchandise. How embarrassing.
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Grass probably helped me as much as it hurt me. Especially as a performer.
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If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else.
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When I first heard the song Don't worry - be happy I realized it was exactly the kind of mindless philosophy that Americans would respond to. It would make a great national anthem along with Me first.
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I can remember staring at the orphanage and feeling envy.
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When people say “clean as a whistle”, they forget that a whistle is full of spit.
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You live eighty years, and at best you get about six minutes of pure magic.
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Medical researchers have discovered a new disease that has no symptoms. It is impossible to detect, and there is no known cure. Fortunately, no cases have been reported thus far.
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That's the whole meaning of life, isn't it? Trying to find a place for your stuff.
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If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you're gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders.
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Isn’t making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?
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When you think about it, attention-deficit order makes a lot of sense. In this country there isn't a lot worth paying attention to.
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