Quote

When someone is impatient and says, 'I haven't got all day,' I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?

George Carlin

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Wonder
Someone
Always
Impatient
Genuine
Havens
Haven
Says

More quotes by George Carlin

Image
People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.
George Carlin
Image
Does killing time damage eternity?
George Carlin
Image
You never see a smiling runner.
George Carlin
Image
Everyone smiles in the same language.
George Carlin
Image
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
George Carlin
Image
Religion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind.
George Carlin
Image
Can placebos cause side effects? If so, are the side effects real?
George Carlin
Image
It is impossible for an abortion clinic to have a waiting list of more than nine months.
George Carlin
Image
In terms of coke, the only money I ever thought about was that dollar bill I had stuck up my nose.
George Carlin
Image
Personally, when it comes to rights, I think one of two things is true. I think either we have unlimited rights, or we have no rights at all. Personally I lean towards unlimited rights, I feel for instance I have the right to do anything I please, BUT! If I do something you don't like I think you have the right to kill me.
George Carlin
Image
Military cemeteries around the world are packed with brainwashed dead soldiers who were convinced God was on their side. America prays for God to destroy our enemies. Our enemies pray for God to destroy us. Somebody's gonna be disappointed! Somebody's wasting their time! Could it be.. everyone?
George Carlin
Image
Every day I break my own personal record for number of days I have been alive.
George Carlin
Image
Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.
George Carlin
Image
Did you ever look at your watch, and you look away... and you don't know what time it is?
George Carlin
Image
Dogs and cats get put to sleep hogs and cows get slaughtered.
George Carlin
Image
I say things that can be defined as prayers. But I don't pray to a power or ask an entity to intercede in the earthly scheme, because I don't believe that happens. But if I see a really unfortunate person in the street, I do pray, yes, though I suppose it's really more like a mantra to ease my own sorrow.
George Carlin
Image
I used to be Irish Catholic. Now I'm an American - you know, you grow.
George Carlin
Image
Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky.
George Carlin
Image
George Washington’s brother, Lawrence, was the Uncle of Our Country.
George Carlin
Image
That's the whole meaning of life, isn't it? Trying to find a place for your stuff.
George Carlin